Winter and Fall

With Giant Spruce. From Last Winter.

Last weekend the temperature was hovering at 36 degrees Celsius. And now it's dropped. It's some 3 degrees outside. It feels like winter has come. And I am not complaining about the weather. I love the cold even though I feel somewhat strange inside when the cold first descends. One winter, when my nose was freezing and tears, which had nothing to do with my emotional state, were streaming down my eyes and I had to give in and wait inside a building for a few seconds to get out of the wind, I still said out-loud, "I love winter."

I know that it's not really winter that's come. It's just the sudden and abrupt cold that's going to give way to some warmer and startlingly clear, crisp, and sunny days with the leaves changing colour but in my head it's already white and icy and snowy and windy...

The giant spruce outside my apartment died a couple of months ago. It was a stunted tree, people say. This time when the snows come I won't be staring at the miniature tree and pretend that I'm looking in on a snowy landscape with nothing but a giant blue spruce.

The sudden chill triggers off memories of a haunting story, one piece of music, of other times and other places and sometimes of other times and of the same place. I realised some days ago that I've been in this town for a long time, and have hardly left it. Considerably curious is that I never quite feel that I should visit other places because I still feel like a traveler or a visitor somehow. I've been to the airport about four times to drop off and pick up friends over these last some weeks, and every time I've been gently startled by the fact that there are other places and real people on this planet....

P.S: Over the last couple of days the leaves have started changing colour.

P.P.S: When winter really comes, this year - maybe, I'll put up a proper post on the season.